Old Undies, New Year

So, I guess it’s me and every other blogger writing our new year’s resolutions about now. My resolutions below are few, and deeply shallow, but I hope achievable:

1) Go dancing more often. I didn’t dance much as a young thing because I thought I was really crap at it. But now that I’m nearly of an age where women are invisible to most of the population a) it doesn’t matter if I’m crap or not and b) I don’t care whether I’m crap or not.

2) Dress up more in fancy dress, sparkles, OTT makeup, wigs and super-high heels. This may well happen in conjunction with resolution #1.

3) Stop having my hair dyed a dark colour.  There are two reasons for this: a) because dark dyes may be connected to some cancers and b) because I think I’m losing some pigment and my skin really doesn’t suit deep colours anymore. The problem is, how to do it, and what to aim for? Do I want to look like Pixie Geldof or Emmy Lou Harris’? After a bit of an internet search I think this is very elegant, what do you think?

4) Go back to Iyengar yoga, because although I dread going, and I hate it while I’m there, I feel great afterwards.

5) Buy better quality underwear. I mean, I’m technically rich now, I’m earning more than the average wage for the first time in my life, so perhaps my undies can reflect this, instead of looking like something you might use to apply the furniture polish with.

5) Ditch the Liptons & Dilmar teabags and only drink nice tea, like the Morning Red from T2 that I’m sipping now.  I’m worth it.

6) Cultivate some straight friends. Why are nearly all my good friends queer? It’s embarrassing, because when I have parties or dinners I’ll do a guest list thinking “Oooh, Adam & Will will really like Suzanne & Tracy, and I haven’t seen Grant & Andrew for a while, and Margie & Julia have to come”, and then they all turn up and it looks like I’ve organised Big Gay Al’s Big Gay Boat Ride. Where to find these elusive heterosexuals though? Suggestions or applications welcome.

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15 Responses to “Old Undies, New Year”

  1. Pavlov's Cat Says:

    Re 6, speaking as an unattached person (not officially, at least), you might find those elusive heterosexuals in the ranks of the single. We are quite good value at dinner parties, if only because we have to try harder (since there is nobody else to carry the social weight) and keep ourselves nice (as there is no one to nudge us, apologise for us, look after us or, if necessary, remove us). My favourite hosts are the ones who don’t invite people in twos and don’t care about gender balance at all.

  2. Zoo Says:

    Perfect!

    1. I didn’t dance in public ’til I was at least 25 (which seemed old then) and its only been in recent years I have been able to do it without drinking copious amounts of alcohol (which makes you dance more crapply, but care less that you are totally unco).
    2. Yay! Dressups are FUN! We can shop for false eyelashes together 🙂
    3. Nowt wrong with being a Pixie, though would prefer to sing like Emmy Lou. And if you want to return to the darkside its easy enough.
    4. I always blather on about yoga too. Hmm. You are right, I should go. I mean, you should go.
    5. Yes! Better living through nice knickers! Oh, how I remember posh undies, ones that matched my bras and all. For years I avoided either item wherever possible, but now the lure of satiny lacy soft lingerie is becoming stronger…
    5 (b). Yes you are. Nobody should have to drink Liptons. Could be worse though, could be Bushells.
    6. With a few obvious exceptions, I really don’t know many straight people. Sorry I can’t advise on this one. Some of them do seem nice, just not sure where to find them or how to hunt them– I usually just meet them through my queer friends or at art openings. Hmm. Maybe there is some sort of internet support group? Try Facebook.

  3. BG Says:

    haha re: number 6. aww c’mon….. enjoy your friends for who they are, not what they are! 🙂

    [i realise i don’t need to tell you this, and it’s tongue firmly in cheek, but it made me laugh and I had to say it]

    I have only one rez: don’t spend so much money! (i’m hoping this will automatically sort out my drinking and weight problems by stopping me from spending so much on alcohol and food!!!)

    have a great new year

  4. Meredith Jones Says:

    Thanks Kerryn, you have a standing invitation to dinner at my place. Zoo, looking forward to that shopping trip. BG, so long as you don’t resort to cheap alcohol that should work.

  5. genevieve Says:

    Meredith, what a great list.

    Undies and tea – go get ’em! I need a trip to DJs or KMart to source a full supply of my favourite black cotton knickers, as the supermarket no longer carries them. Good tea is one of the world’s great gifts to us.

    The hair is also a fun thing. I am going grey this year, after allowing a young hairdresser the freedom to wreak a half head of foils on my dark hair, resulting in some pretty freaky orange streaks and a pixie haircut to tidy it up. Agree regarding the skin issue – I have the same problem, and admire Emmy Lou Harris’ voice and hair solutions. But one of my younger sister’s friends has gone silver at 48 – so I reckon, what the hell. And the haircut has worked wonders, even though the foils are not quite gone yet. I might be tempted to some light tips later in the year – I’ll see.

  6. genevieve Says:

    oh dear, I meant to say, Happy New Year too!

  7. phil Says:

    meredith, the tea thing is the most important on the list. I’m hoping to have an accident die with bad undies on so that I’m famous for something. Your hair was lookiing georgous on Christmas day. But if your’e gunna wig it, then the whole rainbow is there.

  8. Grant Says:

    We are honoured to get a mention in your post 🙂

    I’m with you, we should all dress up and go dancing more!! Sounds like we all need a Bad Dog party 😉

    Happy New Year.

    Grant, Andrew & Lili xxx

  9. elsewhere Says:

    Oh, the hair dye question…such a dilemma! I do feel that this is really only a question that a gay male hairdresser can answer adequately and diplomatically.

  10. Kirsty Says:

    Heh, I like Pav’s response to the dinner parties. Actually, one of my resolutions this year is to have more people over for dinner, so I will keep this in mind, which, since I am the single one won’t be so difficult.

    Nice undies and tea are great resolutions too. Happy New Year.

  11. newswithnipples Says:

    Dancing more is a great thing to do. After a lifetime of foot tapping near the wall, I started tap classes last year and it’s the best thing I’ve ever done. And I’m going to steal your nice tea idea.

  12. Andrew Says:

    Some thoughts for you on the haircolour front: Going from dark ARTIFICIAL colour to light is challenging and not always possible. The really light bleached looks you have championed are definitely achievable on your natural hair but getting your coloured hair to that look would be difficult and potentially compromising to your hair condition. It would be more likely a process possible in stages as lightened dark colour first will throw orange/warm tones. See this page which shows how Ashlee Simpson had to go through transitions to get from her dark coloured hair to blonde.
    http://www.bellasugar.com/896049
    x Andrew

  13. Meredith Says:

    Andrew, thanks so much for this. Can I cook you lunch in exchange for hair advice in person?
    mj xx

  14. Keren Says:

    As a single house-trained heterosexual, I’m with Pavlov’s Cat. Available at short notice as well!
    Given your workload, I’m not sure I should suggest a riverwalk one day …

  15. Susie Decker Says:

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